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Tuesday, 18 March 2008
an interesting morning...
Now Playing: the pounding of my own head...

to say the least, it's been an interesting morning.

beth and i were getting ready for work and day care drop-off duty when she mentioned that we needed to schedule some time together over the weekend. i thought she meant a date night - she actually meant a half-hour to discuss some things. i told her that it all depended on when i was getting together with a friend on saturday. shortly afterwards, she began to tell me how i have been rejecting her ever since we got married, that she's unhappy with how she looks, and about how we need counseling in order to address the problems that we've been having in our marriage. i didn't even know how to respond to all of this. prior to this going down, i was thinking to myself, i'm still in my robe and i need to get dressed so i can get simone ready to go to day care.

like i said, it's been an interesting morning.

she said that she would take simone to day care this morning. once she took her outside, i finished getting ready, jotted some notes onto a pad, set up the microphone and recorded a voiceover for endless shouting matches with yourself. whether it will actually be released remains to be seen, because it's pretty personal...more personal than i have ever dared to share on that show. once the microphone was put away, i sat on the futon in the living room and read my Bible. after that, i got on my knees and began to pray, but the words wouldn't come.

i opened my eyes to find that i had fallen asleep on my knees, my head resting on the futon. i bolted upright and ran to the nearest clock. it said 9:40 a.m. - i had planned to catch a 9:38 train, which meant that i was going to be later than usual. i made a call to the office, but they were cool about it. when i got to work, i noticed that my wife sent me a text message on my cell phone: "did you mean date night? i only meant 30 minutes." gotta love misunderstandings.

like i said, it's been an interesting morning.

two shows have gotten me through today: my love for music and a dark jungle dj set by woz. the former chills me out while the latter gives me the spark that i need to keep fighting. i desperately needed both elements today...

Posted by macedonia at 6:04 PM EDT
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