One. Collector?s Blues.

I know I?ve said it before, but it bears repeating: when you?re excited about so much music yet you have so little money, there is no joy in Mudville. Absolutely none. Almost makes me wanna join the peer-to-peer collective. Almost. I like buying music and DVDs too much to be a KaZaa addict. It?s the nature of a collector, I guess. Don?t get me wrong ? I like free MP3s as much as the next person. But even if I had a broadband connection, I just don?t see myself going the P2P route. Yeah, I?m one of those ?free and legit? guys, go figure. I also enjoy digital sampling and making sound collages, so I?m certainly not free from major label scrutiny.

Two. Anniversary.

Today marks one year at Rosen Publishing. Excuse me while I wait for the confetti to fall from the ceiling.

They say that ?the customer is always right.? No, they?re not. They?re right even though they?re wrong. And they?re wrong often.

I?m still trying to process the idea that I?m almost 31 years old and I?m working an entry level job that keeps me bored out of my f**king skull. But I do my work. And I get things done. And I try to make customers as satisfied as possible. And let?s face it: it?s kinda hard to screw up a job that you?re dangerously overqualified for. All this because it?s required by law to accept a job position if you?re offered one while on unemployment or be in violation of Department of Labor laws. Ma Dukes doesn?t seem to understand that and I don?t have the time or the patience to explain it.

Since Sunday, I?ve had this weird feeling. It?s as if something spoke to me and said, ?This week is the week that will change your life.? I have no idea where that voice came from. I haven?t a clue as to what the change will entail. I?d like to think that it can?t be any worse than what I?ve already gone through. Seeing as how a thousand years are but a day in God?s eyes, my idea of a week and His idea of a week are two totally different concepts. But I do know this: I?m still here. My circumstances haven?t killed me. And God will deliver me from this when He sees fit to do so.

Three. RNC remembrances.

There was one day during the Republican National Convention that I saw a number of delegates wearing Band-Aids on their cheeks. I had no idea what that was all about. Couldn?t figure it out. I mean, I didn?t think Republicans liked Nelly. I just couldn?t see them partying to ?Tip Drill? at an after-hours club somewhere. Then I noticed the purple hearts on the Band-Aids and the light bulb came on over my head.

Oh, it?s a dig at Kerry, I said. And everything made sense again. As much as it can when you?re watching the RNC, the only place where they have the nerve to launch into McFadden & Whitehead?s ?Ain?t No Stoppin? Us Now? after Chaney?s acceptance speech, then follow it up with a Brooks & Dunn tune.

McFadden & Whitehead, Brooks & Dunn. Apparently the pairing made sense to somebody behind the scenes. I didn?t even think Republicans wanted to be associated with a song that had the word ?Ain?t? in the title, country ditties notwithstanding. Gotta break off a little somethin? for the black GOP reppin? the spot, I suppose.

Black GOP. Jews for Jesus makes more sense than that. Did I mention that Giuliani?s speech made me violent to the point where I would occasionally start shadow boxing at my cubicle the next day?

As for my wife, she has come to two conclusions: 1) Laura Bush is on heavy medication; and 2) somewhere in the back of Zell Miller?s closet you will find a white sheet.

I can dig it.